My plans for writing a sweet Christmas letter were lost somewhere between piles of laundry, forgotten bits of toast and dirty diapers. In fact, if I were to write a Christmas letter, I'd want to keep it tongue-in-cheek yet real, and it would go a little something like this:
Dear Grandma, Auntie, Uncle, Nana... you name it; we’ve got a relative for it.
It's the most wonderful time of year. I'd like to apologize in advance for not sending a photo of the family in matching Christmas pyjamas. While I wear pyjamas 85 per cent of the time, they are not the kind that would inspire a hearty rendition of "Jingle Bells."
I am happy to report that as a mom of two small children, I couldn't be more addicted to sloppy yoga pants and embarrassed by the growing butt-shaped, laptop-warmed dent in the couch, but YAY for working from home!
2013 proved to be an excellent year. Our new baby boy is doing great and we can't believe how fast our two-year-old is growing. Her diet consists primarily of Goldfish crackers, pancakes and cookies, yet she miraculously continues to grow.
Our girl is funny, dramatic and loves to sing. She's pretty much a prodigy and busted out a great version of "Jesus Loves Me" at the post office the other day. After listening to her sing, bystanders clapped and begged for more. There were tears.
You find this scenario incredible? You weren't there.
Just the other day, our sweet girl woke up howling at 2 a.m. because she couldn't get her blanket re-arranged over herself. Why, we remember when she woke up at 2 a.m. because she was hungry! So much has changed.
Speaking of sleep, our son is now four months old and takes up an inordinate amount of space in our bed. When he sleeps, he's sort of like an octopus, all knees and elbows. The child should work for the CIA's Sleep Deprivation Unit. You see, as modern, Sea to Sky residents, we often co-sleep. We talk about the cry-it-out approach the same way some talk about clubbing baby seals.
Our little guy has also started teething. Clearly, teething is a major design flaw in humans. Why can't babies be born with a full set of teeth?
As I am writing this letter, I am happy to say that no one has thrown up in 24 hours. This is a major accomplishment as the Norovirus seems to be ravaging the Sea to Sky Corridor and our family seems to be a Venus flytrap for viruses.
If you are looking for gift ideas, I have a few suggestions. Please do not buy toys without an off button or talking dolls, they creep me out — the way they talk without their lips moving like ventriloquists... it’s freaky.
Do you know what talking dolls say? Stuff like, "Mommy feed me," and "time for a diaper change.” This is the kind of stuff I already hear like 40 times an hour from my own child for free.
While looking at my living room, which has exploded with toys and trinkets of every size, I'm thankful for the chaos. We are hanging in there, even if it's only by our fingernails. Maybe you feel this way sometimes too.
Cherish those you love this Christmas season. We’ll try to do the same.
Love to you and yours,